The Wake

i think only a very handful of ppl who really knew why i went back to penang on last sunday..

well, now tat everything was over, i think i can blog about it now.. actually i didnt go back penang for holiday (though i wished it was for holiday), but for my grandmother funeral.. wat is the point of telling everyone and spoiling everyone’s mood? so i just kept quiet..

nothing to be sad actually.. though my grandma passed away due to some cardiac problem, but it was not a painful death, she slipped away peacefully..

if i take away the white clothes and the altar for my grandma, the whole funeral was like a big gathering for everyone.. aunties and uncles, nephews and nieces, distant relatives tat u rarely meet, old friends of your dad tat u met once a while.. beers and foods and peanuts and mahjong and chit chat and catching up with each other.. and the funeral actually bring me closer to some of my cousins.. which i’m glad and thankful..

in fact i want my funeral to be a happy one.. i will put in my will tat all who attend my funeral to wear bright and colourful clothes, they will sing karaoke, feast and enjoy.. who said funeral must be sad and melancholy??

it is not tat i want to be disrespectful to my grandma, but i think it is a good thing.. at least after she passed away, ppl are still happy.. she always bring happiness to ppl, and after she passed away, her funeral not filled with sadness and moodiness.. of course there still was occasion where ppl sniff a little or give a soft sob.. but we will always remember her..

my grandma funeral make me realise one thing.. the ppl you love will not be with u forever.. so show them your love NOW.. dont give yourself any chance for regret.. i wanted to visit my grandma in early May.. but i didnt make it to penang.. now tat she passed away, i’ll never have the chance to visit her anymore.. kinda regret all the chances that i had but i didnt pay her a visit..

this inspired me to do something with my parents.. to show them more love and care for them more often.. i want and will be writing a biography for them.. i will find one fine days to chat with them, get them to tell me stories from their childhood, dating, marriage, my growing up periods, their retirement and everything.. i’ll compile it into a biography.. it may or may not be published.. but at least i’ll have a memoir of them when they passed away one day.. and at the same time i get to bond with them once again.. it is a big task.. but i want to do it, i can do it and i will do it, very soon!!!